The Iowa Iowan

IOWA CITY—A fierce ongoing dispute has developed between four University of Iowa sophomores after they failed to reach an agreement on what to name their apartment’s wireless network.

The students had left the network at 212 S. Johnson St, #4 named LINKSYS until last week, when Josh Sanderson figured out he could change the name.

“Right away I changed it to ‘baLLz’ but then [roommate Mark Clinton] started being a douche about it,” Sanderson said.

Clinton contends that because he purchased the router, he owns the naming rights. Sanderson, though, said Clinton wouldn’t have been able to set up the network or rename it without him, so he deserves a say in naming it. The other two roommates also want to offer input.

Other units in the apartment complex already have wittily-named networks like “Big Mama’s House,” “Fuck Bitchez,” and “wannamakeloveinthisclub.”

Sanderson shared some of his desired network names with The Iowa Iowan, including “freeSTACHErides,” “blunt rollaz,” and “4 8 15 16 23 42.” He added that his roommates “probably didn’t get the Lost reference.”

At the time of The Iowa Iowan’s print deadline, the router in apartment #4 remained “baLLz,” as Sanderson is the only roommate who knows how to change it. It’s unclear how how long the stalemate will last.